Once I Was One of the People

by Elise Stuart


I write from my place of power,
from an island in the northwest,
where there is more water
than land,

where the shore is a place to dig clams
a place, swept clean each tide,
a place to stretch the eyes
to see farther than this world.

I am a woman
who gathers leaves and digs roots,
carries medicine to others.
I listen, while the heart
heals itself.

I am a woman who once,
but never again,
will join with another.
One day my beloved rode out
with our warriors.

Men walked back,
wounded, bleeding
I waited―he never returned.
He died for our tribe’s honor, so now
I will have no other.

Few women befriend me.
I cannot share their talk
of coming births or children
or smile secretly about their men.

For a long time I was too jealous
of something I would never have again,
then three heart sisters let me into their lives.
Yet I am still alone.

I have become respected by the elders.
Visions appear in dreams,
that show what is to come.
They listen in the circle of firelight,
calm and seeing.

Sometimes I see into the hearts of people.
I do not fool myself.
My people are kind and cruel,
our small tribe, dying out.
all part of the wheel of life.

Even now, I return to the shore
to sew medicine pouch with bone needle
and withered hands. 
Solitary, like many of the wild ones,
I watch the wind and waves.

Can I use the running stitch
to sew through time,
to take what I’ve learned
from this life to the next—
to find the peace that eludes me?


* * * * *

Elise Stuart, Poet Laureate of Grant County from 2014-2017, is the author of a collection of poems, Another Door Calls, and a memoir, My Mother and I, We Talk Cat. She facilitates an open poetry group, River Poets, that is still alive and growing, and hosts the monthly poetry event at Tranquilbuzz Coffee House in Silver City. She has led numerous poetry workshops with youth and supports their voices being heard. She is at work on a new book of poetry.