One Day at a Time

by Tzivia Gover 

 
The first time I saw her
10 days after her son
who was secretly no longer
 
(let that fractured sentence stand for itself)
 
and before I could choose words
to say and not to say
whether to hug
 
her body collapsed
into me and my arms
surrounded her dead weight
 
and held on “been a long time”
“meaning to call but”
“if there’s anything --”
 
my daughter’s ringtone pulsing 
interruption I fought to ignore
the betrayal bouncing at my hip
 
in the presence of grief
some lives
some children
 
Back in my car driving
stopped at a light 
tap call back

while cooing at a grinning
dog in a bruised Toyota one lane over 
when my daughter picked up
 
I heard her over the speaker
trying to make sense of my giddy
goofiness “but you don’t even like dogs”

I couldn't tell her
here in half-moon darkness
and all the bad news in the world

red light turning green
and the glad-panting dog
not knowing the weight of my fear

and traffic was still then
moving that because she's alive
and as far as I know


* * * * *

Tzivia Gover is a dreamwork professional, poet, and author. Her most recent book, Dreaming on the Page: Tap into Your Midnight Mind to Supercharge Your Writing, combines writing and dreamwork. She has been published in dozens of journals and anthologies including The Mom Egg Review, The Naugatuck River Review, and Lilith Magazine. She teaches, writes, and dreams in western Massachusetts. Learn more at www.thirdhousemoon.com